How to Find the Line Between Compassionate and Controlling Management

Two local leaders share tips for finding the right balance of hands-on and hands-off management.

Written by Eva Roethler
Published on Mar. 22, 2022
Brand Studio Logo

Unfortunately, there are a lot of costs to micromanagement. New managers often feel the pressure to prove themselves as competent leaders. Meanwhile, transitioning from an individual contributor to a manager requires a completely different skill set. One of the most common mistakes a new leader can make is micromanaging employees to try and hit team performance goals through force and control. 

For one, employees may check out because they know their manager will take control, resulting in a disengaged team. It can create a culture of poor morale with employees who lack autonomy. Ultimately, micromanaging can lead employees to resign.

How can new managers avoid this costly mistake? How do they know where to draw the line?

Built In NYC asked two local leaders to share their advice for finding the right balance between compassionate and controlling leadership styles. 

 

Biz2Credit team members in the office
Biz2Credit

 

Image of Susie Moy
Susie Moy
Marketing Manager • Biz2Credit Inc.

 

Biz2Credit is a platform that matches small businesses to sources of capital.

 

How does an effective manager know when to stand back and be hands-off, or take a more hands-on approach with direct reports? 

They have to know their team members very well and know their individual strengths and weaknesses. If they are asking their team to take on a new project, they have to know whether employees will excel or if they will struggle with it. If the former, then they should be hands-off and trust their subordinate. If the latter, then let the employee know that this is a great learning opportunity and that they are available to guide them through it. 

The team I manage now is still very green in their career, so it’s a lot of pressure to know that the way I manage them now could mold their professional outlook forever. I want to be as good of a leader as I can be for them.

 

How would you describe your management style? 

I let my team know that I am always available for them, and I want to be as transparent as possible. Most of the teammates I manage are very green in their career, interns or recent graduates, so they are likely hearing about a lot of the things for the first time and I empathize with that. I always give them as much context as possible before letting them run with a task. I make sure that it’s meaningful and challenging work, and I let them know why they are doing it and make sure they are learning in the process. I like to give everyone clear-cut tasks so that they feel they have something to own and be accountable for. But I also love giving them projects that they can collaborate on; it’s very fulfilling to see them all building a camaraderie and trust in one another. 

We also have weekly meetings where we all align on our projects. But most importantly they are a way for us all to connect and be transparent. I’ve learned that a good employee should anticipate the needs of their managers. But as I recently stepped into a leadership position, I learned that a good manager should also anticipate the needs of their subordinates.

When you treat a direct report as an equal, they will live up to that role.”

 

What can a new manager start doing right now to help become a better manager?

They have to connect with their team on a personal level. It’s always easier to work with someone when you like them as a person. Also, don’t ever let your team feel unsupported. I have had bosses whom I felt didn’t care about our well-being, and just wanted to push us to the limit in order to make themselves look good. Always have your team’s best interest in mind, because they can feel it when you don’t. Just because they don’t say anything or complain doesn’t mean they are not feeling any negative feelings. 

Finally, understand that they are likely hearing a lot of the things you are saying for the first time, so make it as easy as possible for them to grasp. Don’t worry about sounding smart, because if you cannot explain it easily, you probably don’t fully get it yourself. Give them the respect that you would give your peers. When you treat a direct report as an equal, they will live up to that role.

 

 

 

Image of Karl Shouler
Karl Shouler
Engineering Manager • Thirty Madison

 

Thirty Madison is a specialty healthcare company. 

 

How does an effective manager know when to stand back and be hands-off, or take a more hands-on approach with direct reports? 

Effective managers put trust in their teams to execute — after all, they are closest to the situation — and I want folks on my team to take on ownership and complexity that’s beyond what they’ve previously seen. Managers can find opportunities to be more hands on to help someone grow when they’re pushing up against the current limit of their abilities. Diving in to help mitigate a live-site issue or pairing with someone on a tricky bug are also a chance to roll up your sleeves and build camaraderie with reports.

Managers can find opportunities to be more hands on to help someone grow when they’re pushing up against the current limit of their abilities.”

 

How would you describe your management style? 

I’m always looking to learn more about the engineers on my team; their interests; past experiences, and what gets them up in the morning so I can find ways to connect them and their career goals to work that will grow the business and deliver value to our patients.

 

What can a new manager start doing right now to help become a better manager?

Realize you’re going to be most effective driving change and building through others. You may be comfortable executing like you did as an individual contributor but that will be limiting compared to multiplying the efforts of your reports.

 

 

Responses have been edited for length and clarity. Images via listed companies and Shutterstock.