“Men are promoted for their potential, while women are promoted for their past success.”
Melanie Murphy, SVP of analytics at marketing company Fluent, made this observation when asked about her professional journey in tech. With nearly two decades of leadership experience, Murphy said she was never “scared” to advocate for herself; she simply hadn’t realized she needed to do it early in her career.
She and Robin Sherk, senior director of consumer research at market intelligence platform CB Insights, said that self-advocacy is an ongoing journey, but one that’s importance cannot be understated. Throughout Sherk’s career, speaking up and making senior leaders aware of her most significant contributions and ideas has led to exciting projects she wouldn’t have gotten the opportunity to tackle otherwise.
Both Murphy and Sherk had plenty of advice for women looking to advance their careers in tech, but one tip stood out: Track and document your successes.
“It’s easier to get leadership’s recognition when your results can speak for themselves,” Sherk said.
Melanie Murphy, SVP of analytics at Fluent, said that over the years, she’s learned that self-advocacy generates positive change not only at an individual level but also for a team. After speaking up to a former boss about communication breakdowns, she was able to move forward with her work and lift up colleagues who had also been affected.
How have you gotten past any fears or doubts about advocating for and promoting yourself, your accomplishments and your abilities?
I can’t say that I was ever afraid of advocating for myself. I simply didn’t realize that I needed to until the point I knew I had to. Early in my career, I believed that your work should speak for itself. I also believed that it was a leader’s job to advocate for their people, probably because I was fortunate enough to work for and learn from such leaders.
As my career progressed and I grew as a leader, I made other observations. I observed that men are not shy about advocating for themselves and do so often. I also observed that men are promoted for their potential, while women are promoted for their past success.
I realized that in order to continually advance my career as I wanted, I needed to play a more active role. I needed to become more comfortable speaking up and advocating for myself. It didn’t come naturally. It certainly was difficult. But with time and practice, it does get easier.
What advice do you have for women who may feel like their contributions are being overlooked in the workplace?
My advice to women who may feel like their contributions are being overlooked is to focus and reflect on their communication first. Communication, storytelling and socializing your work is important and requires practice. Creating a high-level status report that you can share regularly with leadership and stakeholders provides transparency that is hard to overlook. It may take you several iterations to find the best format and appropriate level of detail. After you find something that works, be prepared to revise it later on. Just do not give up.
If you don’t feel that it’s being read, then schedule time to walk the recipients through it. I’d also recommend having open and honest conversations with your manager. Most managers and leaders want their teams to be happy and feel fulfilled and satisfied in their roles. Being recognized for your contributions is part of that. You may also want to consider finding a mentor, either within or outside the organization, who can give you unbiased feedback and coaching along the way.
Communication, storytelling and socializing your work is important and requires practice.’’
Share an example of a time when self-advocacy paid off.
There was a period when I was having a tough time at work. My boss had said and done things that were upsetting to me and in some cases, my team. I just could not shake it. Normally, I would describe myself as someone who has thick skin, does not take things personally and rarely remains upset about anything for very long. But this was different. I was so upset that I did not think I would be able to get over it unless I spoke up and had a direct conversation with my boss. So that’s what I did. I reached out and let him know that I had concerns and challenges that we needed to discuss.
When we met, I walked him through each concern I had by describing the situation, what he had said or done, and the resulting impact. We ultimately spent hours that day talking through each scenario, its action and its impact. Once he shared his perspective, we agreed upon what we each could or should do differently in the future.
One conversation opened the door to many other conversations that strengthened our relationship. It also made us more effective as a team.
Robin Sherk, senior director of consumer and retail research, looks for advocates in every professional setting she enters. At CB Insights, she participates intentionally in meetings and includes her team in broader company discussions as much as possible. Her advice for those wanting to take self-advocacy one step further? Have tracked goals with tangible data ready to present at performance reviews.
How have you gotten past any fears or doubts about advocating for and promoting yourself, your accomplishments and your abilities?
It can be awkward to advocate for yourself. But it’s important to get recognition for the value you add to the business. I’ve found self-advocacy comes naturally when it’s based on confidence in the quality of my work and feeling secure with my team. So I focus on addressing wider team needs as part of my goals. These set the stage to make self-advocacy feel more natural.
It’s also about being intentional in participating, especially in important meetings. I don’t want others to feel the need to speak for me or discount the perspective I can add.
If others don’t know what you own, they won’t know how to recognize your contributions.’’
What advice do you have for women who may feel like their contributions are being overlooked in the workplace?
First, I would try to identify why this is happening. Do peers, and more importantly, department managers, know what projects you lead? If the answer is “no,” I would try to make a point to share your successes through informal coffee chats, regular team check-ins or in update emails. If others don’t know what you own, they won’t know how to recognize your contributions.
Next, does the team have a culture of tracking performance? It’s easier to get leadership’s recognition when your results can speak for themselves. Set and track goals from the start of the quarter or project to be able to highlight your wins in performance reviews.
Lastly, look for advocates. Who in management have you worked with directly? Who believes in the quality of your work? Build a relationship with them.
Share an example of a time when self-advocacy paid off.
Years ago in a previous job, I was first tasked with leading research and advisory coverage in Canada. At the time, I was concerned that we didn’t have the data depth to win the types of projects we needed to build our profile further. So I spent more than a year identifying sources, scoping a new research offering and pitching to various senior leaders why we needed to add investment to really grow this space.
In the end, leadership agreed with the added investment and our portfolio in-market expanded. Through this process, I realized that the proposal’s success relied on leadership’s confidence in my work and recommendations. This never would have happened if I didn’t speak up.
